This might surprise you - for me this year is all about following through with my word. Whatever I say I will do, that’s what’s happening. Period. No exceptions. No punishment. No shame.
This also means NOT committing to doing anything I don’t want to do - which frankly feels even edgier for me.
So when I think about New Year's Resolutions, I’m feeling very… precise. I am resolute. I am committed. I am not trying something on, nor forcing a change I don’t really care about. I am using the beginning of 2019 to create a ritual around raising the standard on my life.
I have been asking myself - what does it look like to live in total truth to my word. Where am I out of integrity now? Where am I at risk to fall out of integrity this year? There’s a lot of room for growth here.
And in order to truly grow on that edge of our own excellence, we must practice deep, rich, and relentless self-compassion. It doesn’t help when we beat ourselves up. We are great at finding ways to punish ourselves, and while sometimes fear and self-attack will motivate us to do something once, it’s unsustainable and counterproductive in the long run.
When you look at the year 2018 through the lens of self-compassion, what do you notice?
Where did you find opportunities to love and celebrate yourself this year?
Where did you beat yourself up?
When I did this reflection, I realized something fascinating:
When I zoomed way in on “today,” I didn’t feel strong in the self-compassion department. Had I done anything great? Questionable. And I know that at any point during the year if I had zoomed in close, I might have felt the same. I tend to be hard on myself that way.
But! When I zoomed out over the whole year, I felt pretty fantastic. I could see the progress I’ve made, and scan through tons of bright shining moments. It was easy to find something to appreciate myself for when I looked at all 357 whole days!
This zoom lens can work the other direction as well. If your reflection on the whole year doesn’t fill you with self-love, try finding a moment to zoom in on - a time when you helped, loved, or connected with someone; a small but meaningful accomplishment; a new insight you received or project you began.
You can always find SOMETHING to celebrate about yourself!
And it’s essential to celebrate yourself as the year turns.
Cultivate your ambition, yes. You are here for all the success, all the joy, all the expansion. And while you’re pursuing this, find the place where self-compassion and ambition coexist.
Because here’s the thing: in all of my work as a mindset coach (as well as a high school math teacher!) I’ve never seen anyone rise to the occasion when they feel bad about themselves. It is our joy in living, and our enthusiasm for more life, that gets us going.
As you reflect and vision this holiday season, consider how you can love yourself more, while you raise the standard of excellence, service, joy, love, success, and surplus in your life?
Play with your zoom function.
How many things can you find to celebrate?
How can self-love and high standards for success work together in your life?
With love and blessings,
PS. Want a great tool for visioning your 2019? Compassion, success, growth, and all? THEN, join me in a visionary exercise to help you create your ideal year! It’s a letter from your future self - an exercise in self-love, and an amazing tool for manifestation! Click here <3