Today let’s talk about ARRIVING. How do you get all the way to your desired destination?
Even if you don’t know all the steps in advance.
In the last two blogs, we’ve fine-tuned the process of using your “inner GPS” - knowing where you are, knowing where you want to go, and staying on course.
But have you ever gotten stuck, just because you don’t know precisely “HOW” you’ll get get to your destination, goal, or outcome?
It’s a common misconception that we need all the steps before we can start moving. It just isn’t true!
On your trip from Portland to San Francisco, you don’t study each and every turn before you embark.
You listen to your GPS and follow the directions. One at a time. That's it.
Of course if you’re anything like me, you probably like to skip ahead and see what the future directions are on your phone. It’s like getting out in front of yourself, trying to see the map in advance.
You can certainly do that.
But if you do it while you’re driving, it might throw you off. You get distracted.. While you’re busy looking at your phone, you accidentally weave in and out lanes. You get into an accident, hit somebody, or most likely of all… MISS THE DIRECTION THAT IS COMING UP NEXT.
Skipping ahead can create problems.
Looking at the future steps can be fun. But it won’t be helpful if you crash in the process.
Focus on one step at a time.
Sometimes looking at all the steps involved in “how” to do something is not necessary. It can actually get in the way.
This would be like driving while opening several folded paper maps and struggling to figure which turn is next. Figuring out the next 20 steps isn’t your job — it’s the GPS’s job.
Your job is to listen and take one step at a time.
In terms of goal-setting, what you’re doing is “allowing.” You’re allowing the GPS to guide you. You’re trusting the steps. (Or perhaps you’re trusting your coach, who gave you the steps to take.)
As you take each step, you get closer to your destination.
Isn’t it a relief to know you only have to focus on one step at a time?
So GPS is giving you directions… and you’re following them. Great! You’re on your way to your destination!
If by some chance you miss a turn, what happens?
Oops. You recalibrate.
No big deal, right? A mistake is not a problem — you simply make a legal U-turn whenever possible.
Maybe that “mistake” adds an extra minute or two to your travel time, but it’s not really that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things.
With GPS, it’s easy to recalibrate, because most of us don’t take it personally. If you miss a turn, it doesn’t mean your life is in crisis.
You know you’ll be able to turn around in no time, and get back on track.
So why do we take things personally when we make “mistakes” in other areas of our life?
I’ve had the experience where I’m driving on the highway and I miss the turn and it’s like seven miles to the next exit. That’s kind of annoying. It happens. But really, it’s not that big of a deal.
That’s how life is designed to be.
People get so emotional when they “fail” or make a wrong turn (metaphorically speaking). (When this happens, it’s important to feel your feelings while you’re on the journey, so you can let go of the old stored stuff that needs to be released.)
Course-correcting — without taking it too seriously or too personally — is the goal.
Be able to understand “Oh, I turned right when I was supposed to stay straight.”
If you f*ck up, make an error, or go down the wrong path (temporarily)…it’s no big deal. Recalibrate, fix it, adjust it, do what you need to do to get back on track.
Life is meant to be that simple.
Recalibrate. Make the emotional, spiritual, or mental “U-turn” you need to make…and get on with it.
You’re not permanently lost or stuck forever just because you made a wrong turn.
What you’re going for is urgency, not panic.
Don’t panic if you make a mistake. Make the correction, the move on. And don’t take your mistakes personally, ever.